| Maidens - Mash Up |
Mash Up by Ayr Academy
Scene 1
It is a lovely Friday morning and all of Ayr Academy are sitting patiently in assembly. Mrs McRoberts trots up to the microphone and makes an announcement about the musical to celebrate moving from the old school into the new school. She says unless everyone can agree on what to do, it will not go ahead.
Jennifer: Oh em gee! I can’t wait to see what song will be picked.
Claire: Me too!
Jennifer: We should do a fun song that’ll make people happy!
Claire: Yeah!
Eilidh: Aye, it’d be guid tae have a song that brings everyone thegether.
Jennifer: What about ‘You’ve Got a Friend In Me’?
Claire: That’s such a good song!
Jennifer and Claire sing some of the song. They are cut off by Robert.
Robert: Naw, a hink wae shud sing ‘Flower o Scotland’.
Claire: Ew. No.
Jennifer: We want something that will make everyone feel good.
Claire: Yeah, not some old Scottish song.
Jennifer: What’s it even about anyway?
Eilidh: Are you fur real?
Jennifer: Well we’re not singing that rubbish anyway.
Claire: Yeah, I wouldn’t sing it either.
Robert: Your song’s pants an aw.
Mrs McRoberts interrupts the pupils
Mrs McRoberts: Now, now children there’s no need to argue.
Robert: Aye awright.
Scene 2
The group are all at Robert’s house.
Robert: Awright, come through here n sit doon.
Characters walk into Robert’s living room and take a seat.
Jennifer: I think my song should be chosen because it’s a feel good song; the other song is boring.
Jennifer sings the chorus to ‘One Last Time’. Claire joins in at the end.
Claire: Yeah, see! This is a good song!
Eilidh: Naw hen, somethin Scottish like ‘Caledonia’ is mair like it.
Eilidh and Robert sing the chorus to ‘Caledonia’
Robert: Aye man, I think we shud dae that wan.
Jennifer: No, I disagree, Robert and Eilidh.
Claire: Yeah!
Eilidh: Claire ye don’t huf tae agree wae everthin that cretin says.
Jennifer: Excuse me?
Robert: Ye know whit she means, ye just want they songs because they’re popular the noo.
Eilidh: That song means nuhin, at least ‘Caledonia’ is aboot change.
Jennifer: So is my song!
Robert: Aye, but oors will make people hink of when they were at school.
Claire: Let’s not argue, guys.
Eilidh: Aye, let’s leave the noo and we can talk aboot it mair on Monday.
Scene 3
The characters walk into school. Mrs McRoberts is standing at the door reminding pupils about the musical. She says that everyone needs to agree on the song.
Interval bell rings. Claire and Jennifer run off in a hurry.
Eilidh: Where dae you hink Claire and Jennifer ran aff tae?
Robert: Ah dunno. Listen, whit do you think we should dae aboot this musical? They’re obviously never gonnae agree wi oor song.
Eilidh: Nae idea. Maybe we could try tae work somethin oot. Or look for a different song?
Bell for the end of interval.
***
The characters are now at lunch. They’re waiting in the lunch queue and they see Mrs McRoberts putting a poster up in the dinner hall.
Eilidh: Are you huvin a laugh?
Robert: Whit?
Eilidh points to the poster. Jennifer and Claire smirk.
Robert: Ya wee rats. You went behind oor backs.
Jennifer: Well otherwise there would have been no song. You’re just annoyed you never went to Mrs McRoberts first.
Robert: Who you gettin cheeky wae, ya clown?
Claire: Robert, what was the significance of sticking your nose in?
Eilidh: Because he’s ma pal an a'll leather you any mair a your cheek.
Jennifer: Can you stop arguing? You’re just annoyed you lost. You’re just throwing a tantrum now.
Robert: Oft, who’s tryin tae act hard noo, eh?
Jennifer: You will need Band-Aids by the time I am finished with you.
Eilidh: If that wee dafty wants tae go, ah will go!
Jennifer begins to walk away
Robert: Where dae you hink you’re goan?
Claire: She doesn’t want to fight, she’s not like that.
Eilidh: You shut it! Naebody wanted your input.
Robert: Aye, exactly.
Jennifer and Claire run away from Robert and Eilidh. Robert shouts after them:
Robert: Wee Clairy’s a lyin traitor. She’s naethin but a twister. Here Eilidh, you’ll get a punny for this, mate.
Jennifer shouts back
Jennifer: You’re acting like silly little babies.
Scene 4
Bell rings for the end of school. Robert and Eilidh walk home without Claire and Jennifer. Claire and Jennifer walk the same way so are a little behind them. Eilidh and Robert turn round to see Jennifer and Claire pulling faces behind their backs and laughing.
Robert: Whit you dain that fir?
Jennifer: Doing what exactly?
Eilidh: Pullin faces behind ma back, you eejit.
Jenifer: Who do you think you’re calling an eejit?
Claire : STOP!
Claire begins singing Katy Perry’s Roar.
Claire: “I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath scared to rock the boat and make a mess so I sat quietly agreed politely”.
Jennifer leans forward and trips Eilidh up. Robert pushes Jennifer away. Claire scratches Robert’s arm.
Claire: I’ve had enough!
Robert: Aye and I’ve hud it up tae here wae the two ae ye.
Robert helps Eilidh up.
Jennifer: Don’t speak to us then!
Eilidh: Ken whit, the two ae youse just shut it.
Jennifer: Right, I can’t take this anymore! I’ve had enough of all this arguing. We all either make up, become friends and do the concert or we sit and argue for no reason. I’m away for now until you make your decision.
Robert: Aye right! Nae bother, Jennifer!
Scene 5
All 4 of them are sitting in Mrs McRobert’s office, they are all looking very sorry for themselves.
Mrs McRoberts: Oh my goodness. I can’t believe this has happened. I am going to have to take you all out the show if you can’t sort this out. I am astounded that you can’t disagree about something without resorting to violence!
Eilidh: Am no saying sorry!
Jennifer: You started it, so you should be the first one to apologise.
Robert: Oh aye, just ignore when you pushed Eilidh yesterday then, eh?
Mrs McRoberts: That’s enough. If you can’t sort this out, you are all not in the show at all.
All four look at each other reluctantly.
Jennifer: I am sorry for tripping you up, Eilidh.
Robert: I’m sorry for shovin ye Jennifer.
Jennifer: I am sorry for going behind your back.
Eilidh: Am sorry too.
All 4 smiling at each other, because they are friends again
Miss McRoberts: Good. Now you have sorted this out we can get on practicing for the show.
Robert: But whit song are we goin tae sing, we cannae decide!
Claire: A know, what one we going to sing?
McRoberts: You know, I saw a video the other day that had two songs mixed together. Maybe that would be a compromise?
Jennifer: What, so like a mash up?
McRoberts: Exactly!
Robert: How about efter school yous all come tae ma house and we can practice?
Scene 6
At the show, all 4 pupils back stage behind the curtains, ready to go on but so nervous they are shaking
Eilidh: Am that feart I’ll forget the song, am actually shakin!
Jennifer: Come on, we will be fine, we have practiced for a solid three hours!
Robert: Aye Jennifer’s right. We’ll be great.
Claire: They are shouting on us. It’s time to go on.
All 4 pupils standing on the stage singing their mash up with the crowd cheering them on.
Lyrics to Mash Up:
When I wake up, well I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who wakes up next to you. When I go out, yeah, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who goes along with you. If I get drunk, well, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you. And if I haver, hey, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s havering to you.
But I would walk five hundred miles. And I would walk five hundred more…
Music changes
You used to call me on my, you used to, you used to
You used to call me on my cell phone
Late night when you need my love
I know when that hotline bling
That can only mean one thing
I know when that hotline bling
That can only mean one thing…
Music changes
But I would walk five hundred miles. And I would walk five hundred more, Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles. To fall down at your door.
When I'm working, yes, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s working hard for you. And when the money comes in for the work I do, I’ll pass almost every penny on to you. When I come home (when I come home), oh, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who comes back home to you. And if I grow old, well, I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who’s growing old with you…
Music changes
You used to call me on my cell phone
Late night when you need my love
Call me on my cell phone
late night when you need my love
I know when that hotline bling
that can only mean one thing
I know when that hotline bling
That can only mean one thing…
Music changes
But I would walk five hundred miles. And I would walk five hundred more, just to be the man who walked a thousand miles. To fall down at your door!
The curtain closes and the crowd can be heard clapping and cheering while the group giggle at one another